8:43 p.m. - 2011-12-18
1 year later and i forgot about this damn site
After all this time i am still in a relationship with someone truly special which is ben
although the relationship is slightly conflicted by a few issues
i cant stand his uneducated, religious mom intruding our relationship
i know i am dating her son but i treat him well.
backstabbing, rude, two faced...
she's angry of her own son's happiness; enjoys pouring misery on him and me.
and well the fact we're intimate. we are adults! not children!
he is 20 years old, old enough to make decisions, old enough to choose his own destiny
i never wanted to be disliked by his mentor
what's ridiculous is she has irrational reasons to dislike me
i am no drug user, i stopped drinking. it's lost its charm! so all i do now is smoke weed with him, its a plant not a drug it relaxes people and there are no violent reactions just spontaneous laughter... i prefer that!
i tell myself not to get upset, it's hard not to as i am aware it's her intentions to "scare" me away from ben and it wont work. i have put up with alot of her shit; even after 2 years, i am treated like shit.
i cannot imagine the horrors of the backstabbings about me.
im a good person with values and in development of obtaining my career.
i care for ben i nourish him with love
and i have decided that its best to rarely go to his house. it sounds silly that im avoiding his mom, but it's for the best until the day comes that she finally opens her eyes and sees that i am responsible maybe i can forgive her
however since she is older its indeed important to respect older people
she has been incredibly rude towards me at times
i must amaze her how i never protest or talk back
i say nothing. my ex friend's mom gave me interesting advice when you're in an awkward situation not knowing what to say to someone no matter how it might upset you, say nothing.
i say nothing, there is no reason to bash me.
when im with ben i feel guilty joining in complaining about his mom when he complains about her
so i have made it a goal not to bitch about her when im with him.
i rant on here and now i feel better.

the next issue is money. both of us gotta establish ourselves before moving ahead. i hope he's motivated and not all talk! doesn't seem like he is all talk though.
we broke up twice.
i dont want to again.

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